Road Trip
by the sushi
Summary: I (think I) FIXED IT! Just my attempt at comedy. The typical character stereotypes (for me) are present: Zell is THE single guy, Selphie is an addict, Irvine is...Irvine, Rinoa and Squall are perverts, and Quistis is the only


Road Trip  
A/N:  
Nothing in the fic belongs to me. Blame me if you don't like it.  
*It's a normal, boring day at Winhill as Squall and Rinoa watch television.  
Irvine was out in the country with Selphie, while Quistis took Zell to the  
bar to get him a girl. She thinks he'll end up gay if he doesn't.*  
Squall: ...*watching television*  
Rinoa: Mmm...*snuggle*  
Squall: *falls asleep* snore...  
Rinoa: agitated hmm... *nudge*  
Squall: SNORE ...  
Rinoa: ...  
Squall: snortwhistle...  
Rinoa: Fine, you're not getting any.  
Squall: *wakes up* Wha? What? I'm awake...  
Rinoa: *rolls eyes* ...  
Zell: *bursts in* HEY! Guess what?  
Squall: What is so important? We were talking about getting some here! (I  
need it!)  
Zell: Aw...Squall, you need to get some.  
Squall: I just said that.  
Zell: Oh. Well, why don't you ask Rinoa?  
Squall: Well...I don't know...the last thing she said was that I'm not getting  
any.  
Rinoa: That's right.  
Zell: What about Quistis?  
Rinoa: ...  
Squall: Well—  
Rinoa: a-HEM. I'm only just sitting right here, you know.  
Squall: But—  
Rinoa: Do you really want to finish that sentence?  
Squall: Well, yes I d—  
Rinoa: DO YOU?  
Squall: I would if you would stop INTERRUPTING ME.  
Rinoa: Okies!  
Squall: AS I WAS SAYING, I don't find Quistis attractive at all.  
Rinoa: Speaking of Quistis, where is she?  
Zell: Um, at the bar.  
Squall: Why?  
Zell: I think I said something wrong.  
*FLASHBACK*  
Zell: *walks into bar* Hey bartender, you wanna hear a blonde joke?  
Bartender: Well, I'm blonde, the chick you came with is blonde, the guy  
next to you is blonde, and the bouncer is blonde. Ya really want to tell  
that joke?  
Zell: Not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times!  
*END FLASHBACK*  
Zell: So I was kicked out, and Quistis, uh, stayed. By the way, she wanted  
me to ask if everyone wants to go on a road trip to Timber.  
Squall: Only if it's okay with Rinoa.  
Rinoa: It'll be fun!  
Squall: We're going, then. What about Irvine and Selphie?  
Zell: Yeah, they want to go.  
Squall: So, it's a road trip, then.  
Zell: ROAD TRIP!!!  
Squall: Whatever.  
*The next day, Irvine, Selphie, and Quistis arrive and everyone packs their  
bags.*  
Squall: *carrying suitcase* why can't we take a plane or something?  
Zell: Well, how much do you have?  
Squall: *searches pockets* uh, nothing.  
Zell: Same goes for everyone. Remember how we lost it all?  
Squall: Unfortunately, I remember now.  
*FLASHBACK*  
Zell: Hey, Squall, I bet you all our money [$2.73] that you can't get Rinoa  
to take her shirt off in front of you.  
Squall: I bet you that I can.  
Selphie: Well, you're all alone, 'cause everyone's got all their money  
against you.  
Squall: grumbling I'll show you.  
Zell: Here she comes! Hide!  
Everyone Except Squall: *hides*  
Zell: *peek*  
Squall: Hey, sweetie, could you take off your shirt?  
Rinoa: Uh... ok... *takes off shirt*  
Zell: *can't see* dammit...  
Squall's Brain: Whoa...no bra...Eh, I have the right to stare. *stare*  
Rinoa: Um...you wanna get it on?  
Squall: *stare* ......uh...sure...in our room...  
Squall and Rinoa: *run, slam, lock* OooOOOooh...yeah, baby.  
Everyone Else: DAMMIT! We're broke...and slightly aroused...  
Zell: Time to get wasted!  
*END FLASHBACK*  
Squall: And you stole the money back, and spent it on porno and booze.  
Zell: eheh...how did you know?  
Squall: There's no other way to explain why you've been in your room twenty  
hours a day.  
Zell: ...  
Squall: Oh, by the way, can Rinoa and I borrow some videos later?  
Zell: ......Sure, why not...  
Quistis: What's with the van? Why's it rainbow-colored?  
Selphie: It's Irvine's and mine! I painted it, isn't it groovy? We like to  
smoke stuff in the back!  
Quistis: o.O ...that explains a lot...  
*Everyone finishes packing and gets into the van. Quistis is driving with  
Zell in the passenger's seat, Irvine and Selphie in back of them, and  
Squall and Rinoa in the back seat.*  
Rinoa: Hey, Squall, is that your hand on my butt?  
Squall: Yeah.  
Rinoa: Could you move it?  
Squall: Sure. *wiggles hand*  
Rinoa: Hey! Don't do that! giggle That tickles!  
Irvine: I wanna ride SHOTGUN!  
Zell: Shut up! Go and make out with your girlfriend! *slap*  
Irvine: Hey! *slapslap*  
Zell: HEY! *slapslapslap*  
Selphie: Who wantsum POT?! *waves a joint*  
Squall and Rinoa: *making out* ...mmm... *grope*  
Quistis: Okay, does everyone have seatbelts? *turns around* O_O This is  
gonna be one long trip.  
[TO BE CONTINUED]  
Well, how was it? I need reviews, because I'm new and all. By the way,  
this story may not be so funny right now, as I am typing at midnight.  
It'll get better; I promise a chuckle or your money back! I even made a  
list of stuff! 


End file.
